Saturday, August 18, 2012

*totally random*


Okay so there were two engineering students. Both were looking for jobs so they were roaming about in the streets. One was a rattu tota and passed B-tech by rattofying things.He was a kind of person who knew nothing about the latest trends, technology, gadgets etc. The other one was intelligent. Even though he scored well in his engineering exams but still couldnt get placed for a job in the campus recruitments. Both were walking ....walking ....walking....... They finally decided to go in different directions to look for work so they parted ways. The dumb guy walked for a while.....stood infront of Ramsung company's building and started to shout... "Ramsung is the greatest company ever!" . This drama went on for sometime. The manager got to know about this and became very happy. He called the guy into his office and gifted him a new Ramsung milkyway note. He walked out of the building ecstatic. After sometime he went to a park.. sat down on a bench and started to stare at the Note. He started to touch the screen. Nothing would happen. He decided to sit on it...maybe the heat would make it work... so he sat on it. Still nothing would happen. He licked it.. still nothing would happen. He bought some eatables and kept it on the Note thinking that it is just a mere plate sort of thing and started to eat but still the food kept falling off the edges. He became really frustrated. He started to curse the manager and started to walk. After sometime he met his friend (the intelligent guy). He thought that 'chalo isko bevkuf banate hai'(lets try to fool him). He handed over the Note to him saying "Abey pata hai kya tereko, muje ye jadui plate kone ke Shiv mandir ke bahar mila. Isko istemal karne ke baad na mujhe naukri mil gayi Cowgnizant me. Tu bi rakh ke dekh ise. Shayad tera bi luck khul jaye. (You know I got this magical plate {Note} outside Shiv ji's temple . It helped me to land a job in Cowgnizant. You also keep this. Perhaps it can help you to land a job somewhere". Saying this he handed over the Note to him. The intelligent guy being intelligent he knew what it was took it immediately thanking his friend, excused himself and walked away. He sat down on the same park bench , cleaned the gadget and switched it on. Explored stuff in it....switched it off and started to walk towards Ramsung's office. He went inside and told the receptionist that he wanted to talk to the manager on a very important topic. After sometime he was ushered to the manager's office.
Manager: Yes young man, what do you want? What is that important thing that you wanted to talk about?
Young man- (presenting the Note infront of him) Sir I found this on the road, I guess it belongs to you?
Manager- (after having a good look at the Note) Ah yes... I gave this to a young man....he was of your age I guess. Why would he drop this anywhere? Is he stupid?!!
Young man- I dont know Sir. I just came here to return it back to your company. I should leave now.
Manager- No wait, what is your name?
Young man- Sir Ramesh.
Manager- Ah .. Ramesh what do you do?
Ramesh- Sir I just completed my B-tech, I was just walking to my office . I work for Guava. Today is going to be my first day
Manager- (after thinking for sometime) You seem to be an honest person. I want to hire you...we need loyal people here. How much is your salary there...if you dont mind telling me?
Ramesh- It is around 1 lakh.
Manager- (after thinking for sometime) Hmm.. I'll give you 1.5. Would you like to work for us?
Ramesh- (making a sad face) I will have to talk to my boss. Okay Sir I will work for your company.
Manager- Please bring your marksheets tomorrow I would like to have a look. Also bring all the other relevant documents tomorrow to my office.
Ramesh- I have it right now sir. I was just going to submit my documents today. (and handed over the file)
Manager- hmm .. impressive. Tomorrow 9.30 am sharp be here in the office . Dont be late (smiles)
Ramesh - Yes sir. Thank you .
Manager - You may leave now. I'll tell my secretary to take care of the formalities. And Ramesh.. you can keep the Milkyway Note.
Ramesh- Thank you sir.

Ramesh went in with practically nothing in hand. Walked out with a fabulous pay package and a Milkyway Note.

Moral- 1) Be smart. Dont be a rattu tota. Understand things.. dont just mug them up .
2) Never!! Ever!! Treat a Milkyway Note like the way the dumb guy treated it. God gets really angry.
3) Dont lie about God. If there is no corner ka shiv mandir, dont make up a story about it.
4) If you think there is a chance for you to get something, be cunning. Do a lot of drama.
5)Dont involve Shiv ji in everything. Pay equal importance to our other God's also .
6) If you want to avoid so much of drama, please dont take up engineering .
7) Dont take any of this seriously. This is a product of absolute boredom .


Take care.

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Food :D

Ya I know I have been posting about food lately. I am so obsessed with food and everything related to it (except the pooping it out part). I love eating . I adore food ! I love the texture , colour, aroma....everything of good food! If you ask me what are the things that I love the most in life.. 1)my family 2)reading 3)food! 4) sleeping (what? you thought that am gonna list food at the first place? Nah I am a good, obedient, loving comes first for me). Now a days I keep having dreams about and yellow rosogullas floating about in the air....on the left side there is shahi paneer...on the right.. tandoori chicken, I am in such a dilemma....what to eat first? If I eat paneer first...will the chicken get angry and stomp off? Or will the rosogullas in the air get angry and pour all the syrup into the paneer so that I cant eat it? I get so worried about their feelings that I sometimes wake  up  sweating! Why is life so difficult at times?! Why cant we have 2 3 mouths so that we can eat everything at the same time? And why cant our dreams (the good ones) turn into reality? Why do we have to wake up to the same old sprouts, banana and milk for breakfast (sometimes karela, bhindi, daal and rice for lunch)!!? I'll go paranoid now thinking about all these questions and the possible answers to these questions. Life is harsh sometimes. You get only one Sanjeev Kapoor in a life time, make sure you end up in his house (or atleast kitchen) in your next life. Its your tummy , make it large.. (did that even make sense?) :3

Take care :D